For Fair Use Discussion and Educational Purposes
Link:http://www.raptureready.com/rap10.html
Note: Before commenting on any posts please make sure you either watch or read each post in it’s entirety. Before, making a comment, if you don’t have the time to watch or read fully please restrain from commenting. When you do this it will help to reduce confusion.

Thank you for visiting Rapture Bible Prophecy Forum!

Please add us to your favorites!
http://www.rapturebibleprophecyforum.com
Our Facebook page is :
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Rapture-Bible-Prophecy-Forum/362856490414697
Please LIKE our Facebook page!

May 13, 2013

Dear Esther,
I write this to you in desperation for guidance. I have contemplated for some time emailing you, as I have never let this aspect of my life be known to anyone that doesn’t know both sides of the way I live. After reading the “Dear Esther” column, it was clear to me that this was an avenue I could reach out to.

I believe the advice you give to people who write is filled with compassion and biblically based values. I appreciate the way that you take on the burdens of others. It is to be commended and I hope that my story is not too much of a burden on you, but it was a relief to finally get this off my chest to someone that is not biased.

I want to say thank you for praying for me as you mentioned in you first email to me. A lot of people take the “I’ll pray for you” with a grain of salt. I dismiss this. I believe in the power of prayer wholeheartedly, that's why I am so disheartened, as I pray and pray and I cannot seem to overcome this, which is why, I believe I have been abandoned by God.

For some quick background, I was saved/accepted the Lord as my savior in 1986. Since that time, I have had times where I have been in the Word and full of faith and at sometimes in the world and miserable. I am in the latter now and have been for quite sometime.

I am now 41, married with two children. I have a great wife and my children are wonderful (6 and 4). However, I live a double life. On the outside, I go to church (two times a week) and use biblical values to raise my children. I have been at my same job now, for the same company, for 20 years.

The opposite side of this is I drink a lot and have bouts with drug use (cocaine). I keep these two parts of my life separate. My wife knows that I drink occasionally and has no idea about the drug use, which has gone on and off for the last 12 years.

I might be stating the obvious, but I am miserable and have been for a long time. I go to church and hear a message that punctures my heart and I return home and throw everything out (beer and drugs) and say to myself, “This is it! I must live right and for the Lord!” Within a few days, I find myself stopping at the local bar on my way home from work for drinks, then, it turns into making phone calls to set up the next deal with my “long time associate.”

The crux of the issue is I “feel” that I am too far gone from the Lord, for Him to accept me back. I know the Bible is clear in that He will never leave us of forsake us, but I just think that maybe this can’t be. I try and try and I always fail.

I have no doubt that when I accepted Christ, that it was genuine. I truly believe it was. But I am at the point that I think I have been left to my own accord. I know my salvation is faith-based and not works, but I feel abandoned.

I know rehab is not what I need, because when I am without the substances, I don’t feel the need to have them, but it has been such a habit on and off over the years it’s just “normal” now. I do hate it. I really do and feel horrible about the way I live. I know this seems like a contradiction, but its complicated.

I am to the point where it is not (has not been) fair to my family and my church. I look at my wife and children and it breaks my heart to know that I am doing this myself, to them (even though they don’t know), and most important─to my God─Jesus Christ. Let’s not forget my testimony. I have friends that know both the lives I lead. They are not saved and I am sure that my poor testimony is affecting them as well. This is a far-reaching issue.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated and thank you for reading. I want to beat this for God, family and peace. Oh how I desire that inner peace and joy I once had. It’s irreplaceable. I want to say thank you for praying for me. A lot of people take the “I’ll pray for you” with a grain of salt. I dismiss this. I believe in the power of prayer wholeheartedly, that's why I am so disheartened, as I pray and pray and I cannot seem to overcome this, which is why I believe God has abandoned me.

Like I previously wrote, I believe I have crossed God’s line and this is very frightening to me and I hope this is not the case, as I want to do what is right and someday, I want to hear, “Well done my good and faithful servant.” I hope that this will be the case.

Thank you,

Brian

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Brian,
Thank you for writing and confiding in me and giving me permission to share your dilemma with our readers. You are in no way a burden. Surely there is a solution and the solution is within you and with God. Trust that you can overcome this identity dysfunction. I commend you for your honesty with me. Clearly you are tortured inside. Alcohol and cocaine are insidious foes─as you well know.

I have been thinking and praying about your situation and I am fully confident that you can make a complete turn around with your life. PLEASE. It is up to you. You sound like a very intelligent man. If you don’t let go of the destructive behavior completely, mark my words you will so wish you had. Because at some point the truth is going to come out and believe me, it will be so devastating that you will be spinning. It is just not worth it. You are playing a very dangerous game with your life and the lives of others. I say this with love and for your own good, but it is time to grow-up emotionally and spiritually.

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God” (Romans 12:2).

God will strengthen you each moment of the day and get you on the road to living your life to please Him, and help you not give in to what you call “habits,” once you fully surrender to Him and repent. Our lives need to evolve around the Lord not around ourselves─easier said than done sometimes. But when we are truly committed to the Lord and surrender our selfish will to His perfect will, then we can make great strides.

If the truth is exposed and your wife who has been left in the dark finds out from someone else, even if she forgives you, things would never be the same if you continue this charade. But your relationship could get much stronger and bring you closer to each other if you come clean with her. I KNOW YOU DON”T WANT TO HEAR THAT.

It is those who love you the most that can help you the most. Your wife could be very important to your healing and recovery. Sometimes it is very hard to put aside our pride and admit our weaknesses. No one wants to let anyone down but God is in the business of healing and recovery. I heard a pastor once say, “Our church is like a hospital for the wounded.”

You seriously have to consider telling your wife the truth. I know you know that it is morally wrong to do what you are doing by keeping so much from her. Wouldn’t it be terrible if she found out about your substance abuse because you got caught and were taken to jail? Or found the traces of your drugs in the house? You could even loose your job. Sometimes people who don’t get help loose everything before they admit that they need help and ongoing accountability. And how tragic is that?

Your wife and your children deserve better, and I know you know that. You owe them a decent life and not one that will cause them to feel shame. Do you know that the devil prowls around looking for whom he can pounce on and devour─especially lukewarm Christians? Seeking help and support can be an excruciating prospect but we all need help in different ways at different points in our lives. There is no shame in seeking help when we stumble. The shame is in not repenting and not getting right with those who trust us. Repent, means, “to turn away from.”

Whenever the devil can take down the testimony of a professing believer, he celebrates. How many pastors and prominent Christian leaders have brought shame to the cause of Christ? Far too many: to count. I think it is time for you to really sit down and start counting your blessings. Look at all you have. Do you want to loose everything? Do you have a death wish? Do you want your children and wife to suffer because of your recklessness? God has a way of pulling the rug out from under us when we are in chronic rebellion. I would not underestimate our heavenly Father when it comes to chastising His children.

Alcohol and drug “addicts” do not necessarily use every day. Sometimes, they use only once in a while. The problem is that they keep doing the same thing over and over, again and again and a vicious demoralizing pattern sets in. The issue is not the substance itself and why someone would defile their body, lie and live a hidden dark life. Those things are an outward manifestation of the sin nature.

I really care about my readers and I am extremely aware of the spiritual battle each one of us is faced with. Please know that there is nothing in this world that cannot be overcome with God’s help. I hate to say it, but that old Nike ad, “Just do it” is apropos here. Just do it and just say “no.” Don’t say, “Maybe, just this once” and give your flesh an opening for substance abuse. There is no middle ground here. Cast off all that hinders you.

“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:1).

Brian, that means you will have to cut-off your contacts with all those who have enabled you to destructively drink alcohol and consume cocaine. Some Christians feel it is okay to have a drink here and there. In your case it is never an option unless you want to continue on this downward spiral. And why allow yourself to get into a position where you loose control of yourself and open yourself up to dark entities? Anytime you alter your mind with any type of substance you invite all kinds of trouble.

Prayer is very powerful. But so is self-will. That is your battle and taking it a step further, demonic oppression can occur if we insist on playing on the devil’s playground. Then, when we cannot connect with the Lord and our prayers are hindered, Satan has succeeded in making us believe that God has abandoned us. You have a choice to make and you must make it soon. God is not mocked, but He is also very merciful compassionate. He will forgive you, but you must truly want to surrender your life to Him and repent. You must stop abandoning Him!

“I acknowledged my sin to You, and my iniquity I have not hidden. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the LORD,” and You forgave the iniquity of my sin. Selah” (Psalm 32:5).

We should never put off making a decision to live for Christ, a decision that is genuine. In your case, it would mean a rededication. I believe you were sincere in you initial commitment to the Lord but you have not fully given your life to Him. You have one foot in the world and one foot in your church. It is time to fully rededicate your life to Him if you truly want to break this harrowing cycle.

You can go to the Lord directly with confession and repentance. It does not have to be a big outward public confession. Although, you might want to get baptized if you have not been as an outward expression of your renewed faith. Vow to use all the money you are flushing down the drain on drugs and alcohol to help others in need. In fact that is what I recommend to you to help you turn the corner. Search out a situation where there is tremendous need. So many Christians are in need. The more you start giving of yourself, the closer you will get to the Lord. And the less you will want to compromise your own life and take God’s blessings for granted.

If you know of even one person, a strong Christian you think you can trust and would be willing to give you moral support that would be a good option for you. Others have been in your shoes. We all fall short. It sounds like you must have some caring friends from your church. I know you said you don’t feel you need rehab because when you aren’t using you don’t feel you “need” to. Okay. So for twelve long years you have repeatedly gone back to doing something after that is causing you misery? This is more than a bad habit, Brian.

Rehab is a word that is thrown around too much. What you need is accountability. You have made well-meaning declarations to stop using but you have not been able to. No one who uses thinks they need rehab. But you may be emotionally and psychologically addicted. I absolutely do not recommend groups like AA, but it would not hurt to call around to find a Christian support group experienced with what you are going through.

Considering how long this destructive pattern has been going on, you could at least make a phone call and talk to someone who can help you get the support you need. You are not alone in your sin. Many Christians have had serious battles at various times in their lives. You do need support from caring believers (Galatians 6:1-5). Genuine Christians are not perfect people, but they are forgiven by God’s mercy and abiding grace. And they should be right there for you helping you get through this.

I will keep praying with you. You are not too far-gone for God to embrace you, but I can understand why you would feel frightened. But God is there for you. He does love you so very much. But you must choose, Brian, between Him and the world. Please choose Him. Stay away from bars and from your unsaved unscrupulous friends who are the devil’s emissaries.

Without ongoing support from others who can relate to your situation your future and your family’s future may be very grim. Occasionally a person is quickly healed from a drug or alcohol habit but it is rare. God may want you to connect with certain people who might have some impact for your future and God’s plans for your future. You might be the one to help others who are struggling like you are, once you get past all of this.

Keep the precious faces of your children in front of your mind. They need their father more than you need your drugs. I am sure this is tearing you up inside. You must trust that there is a way out and the answer is that you must to choose to totally surrender your life to the Lord once and for all.

Replace your destructive habits by seriously studying the Word of God and reaching out to others. We are without a doubt living in the last days. Jesus is the Great Physician and His Word is like medicine, truly a healing salve. Do your homework, read and study the Scriptures and get strong in your faith by sharing the gospel and warn others how close we are prophetically to His return.

By giving of yourself you will see how much you have and how little some others have. God has blessed you greatly with money to burn and a beautiful family. A steady job of twenty-years is something millions of people would love to have. Now be like the prodigal son and run home to Him. He is waiting for you with open arms.

“For You, Lord, are good, and ready to forgive, and abundant in mercy to all those who call upon You” (Psalm 86:5).

Please read and contemplate Psalm 143. If you can, also read it aloud many times so you can hear the words.

I am here for you praying and rooting for you. Please keep in touch and let me know how you are doing.

In God’s love,

Esther

“Bless the LORD, O my soul and all that is within me, bless His holy name! Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits: Who forgives all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases, Who redeems your life from destruction, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and tender mercies, Who satisfies your mouth with good things, So that your youth is renewed like the eagle’s” (Psalm 103:1-5).

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Zechariah 12:3,9:
And in that day will I make Jerusalem a burdensome stone for all people; And it shall come to pass in that day, that I will seek to destroy all the nations that come against Jerusalem.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Disclaimer: Rapture Bible Prophecy Forum, ( http://www.rapturebibleprophecyforum.com ) does not necessarily endorse or agree with every opinion expressed in every article posted on this site. We do however, encourage a healthy and friendly debate on the issues of our day. Whether you agree or disagree, we encourage you to post your feedback by using the reply button.

If you are new to this site and would like to post articles, opinions, youtube videos that are appropriate for this site just e mail me at

stevensandiego@ymail.com
I will send you a PASSWORD

Ybic
Steven