Yes, that's me.


Interpersonal Manipulation & Heroes
www.beth-peterson.com

manipulation     cults     intimate partner abuse     recovery & healing     power struggles     being a hero     autonomy     self-determination

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Welcome! This forum is about interpersonal manipulation (especially in its extreme forms) and also about how we are all the hero of our own stories, our own lives.

Highly manipulative relationships and groups include battering relationships, cults, and many others which are more subtle and therefore harder to spot. Being a healthy hero is centered on the opposite -- becoming as autonomous as possible and endorsing the autonomy of others.

Feel free to ask, to comment, and to share.  And please feel free to use a pen name! I know that a lot of times we want to keep our anonymity. 


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Subject:   Re: hanging in there
Name:   Beth
Date Posted:   Apr 5, 06 - 7:36 PM
Website:   http://www.beth-young.com
Message:   I just want to catch a couple of points here...

>>>I have really, REALLY been making an effort to let got of this situation and let Kevin's family handle it (and enjoy every ounce of my own life...although I hope that doesn't sound selfish)<<<

If we don't take care of ourselves, and that means being selfish and guarding our own time, energy, and happiness, we *cannot* help anyone else. It's like what the flight attendants always say; get your own oxygen on and working first, before you deal with people who are even as important as children and spouses. I am very glad you have been working to keep or regain that healthy 'selfishness'. It IS what is needed. By everyone, including Kevin or whoever may be begging for help.

>>>things haven't changed much. I've just been trying to change my reactions to things, if that makes sense. <<<

Perfectly good sense. And very sensible as well! As I say over and over to folk, we cannot control the world around us. The only thing we can control is our own reaction to it, and our own actions within it.

It sounds like you've got a good handle on the right road; don't let the present turmoil shake your faith in your instincts, and don't let anyone jerk you into a false sense of responsibility, guilt or shame.

Hang in there, Cory!!
   


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