| Subject: |
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hanging in there |
| Name: |
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CG |
| Date Posted: |
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Mar 20, 06 - 6:09 AM |
| Message: |
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Beth,
I know I haven't posted for a while -- the reason being that I have really, REALLY been making an effort to let got of this situation and let Kevin's family handle it (and enjoy every ounce of my own life...although I hope that doesn't sound selfish). Anyways, I'm at a point right now where I just need some reassurance and some advice. Although I haven't been posting, things haven't changed much. I've just been trying to change my reactions to things, if that makes sense.
Christmas was chaos. Kevin and Jennifer were supposed to come over their dad's on Christmas Eve, and of course, we got a phone call saying they would be late, and then a hysterical phone call from Kevin saying that it was the "same old sh*t." His dad talked him into coming over by himself, but instead of coming inside, he sat outside in the snow by himself for a very long time before we realized he was even there. Once they got him inside, he treated Jeff and Norman like they were complete strangers and just had this weird stare and kept saying, "I've just got to fix things," etc. I went to bed, because I didn't want to get blamed for it, but to make a long story short, after showing up two hours late to his mom's the next day (when we were leaving), Jeff (my husband) told Kevin that he was upset, they got into a spat, and Kevin told his mom that he thought it was my fault that Jeff was upset. I know I shouldn't have, but I ended up talking to him about it and telling him that I wasn't going to be blamed for their problems anymore, and that Kevin Gregory was an amazing guy that loved everyone, but that she was turning him against everyone that loved him (I just couldn't help it). He hung up on me but then called back and left a message that he loved us.
Anyways, this weekend he showed up at our house. He spent Fri night in a hotel and there was drama galore this weekend with her calling at almost 1:00 am and him hiding his car, etc, etc, ETC. He told his dad that he is afraid of her and knows that she is crazy and that she needs to get away from her, but as of this morning, he had gone back for more. I remember in your book that you said that sometimes people will leave to get enough energy to go back. I guess that's what he did. I really stayed out of it this weekend. His dad talked to him a lot, and my husband talked to him some, but I was just kind to him, hugged him, and told him we loved him. The thing is, now I'm left here questioning whether I should have tried to talk to him -- should have told him the things that she said about how she pretends to like things...basically that what he loves is an ACT and not Jennifer.
This is such a tough situation, Beth. No one knows how to handle it, no one has any experience with it...except for Jennifer (who has quite a bit of experience with it), and I truly think she is enjoying playing with us... sigh...did we handle it right?
-C |
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This forum is about interpersonal manipulation (especially in its extreme forms) and also about how we are all the hero of our own stories, our own lives. 
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